I got onboard the bidet train during the Covid lockdown. Simple to add on at my apartment. It was my #1 request when I moved to my GF’s house. We replaced the whole toilet with the upgrades.
“Hey, if some caked-up mud pie got on your face, would you just wipe it off with a dry piece of tissue and call it a day? No! You’d wash it. So why is your butthole any different?” - Detective Allen Gamble, ‘The Other Guys’
I like the bidet’s we have at home, but I don’t get the ones that are separate from the toilet. Saw this type when visiting San Juan, PR once. Their plumbing system can’t handle toilet paper very well, so it’s all bidets with a stack of washed towels.
Not only do they take up extra space in the bathroom, but are you supposed to waddle over to this thing with a dingleberry hanging out? I don’t get why you’d want that.
The one argument I’ve heard in their favor is from people with vaginas who don’t like the idea of the built-in sprayer catching bits of poop that’ll get in their cootch.
“people with vaginas”, what a world we’re living in
A world with people? With vaginas?
Not all vagina-havers are women is the point you seem to be missing.
What are you talking about?
Reading this on a toilet without a bidet :(
Please send your prayers
Thought and prayers 🙏
So, maybe I’m missing something here, but bidets don’t seem all that great? Everyone on the internet is always proclaiming life changing experiences with these things. However, when I recently used them they don’t seem to do very much. My butthole is still poopy and when I wipe to dry my ass the toilet paper tears.
Operator error.
You need to use the power washer setting. Takes the paint right off the wall…
I read Biden 😢
Skibidi Biden
Had my first experience of a bidet in Japan but not just that, the toilet seat was heated too, that was my first dump after landing
That’s what I love about mine. Automatic lid raise and lower as you walk in, heated ring and water, (both adjustable temp), air dry, (again heated), and charcoal filtered air filtration to minimize the stench from that drive through burrito.
It’s the posh life. Very nearly the equal to having your own chamberlain.
Humm, I see you enjoy Toto. The king of home Bidets!
If I got shit on my arm I would wash it with soap, there’s no soap in a bidet so I don’t get this argument
Water > dry paper.
That’s true but if the argument is “deal with shit on your butt the same way you would deal with shit anywhere else on the body” then the logical conclusion would be to take a shower after every poo
I don’t know about you but I don’t wipe my anus on my face or use it to pick up food. No judgement though.
Do you ever have someone’s face near your junk?
Me either, but I would still prefer it to be clean.
🤌
An actual shit post lol
Bidets are amazing. If you don’t have one you should go buy one, they start fairly low priced
Paid $50 for mine like 7 years ago. Is it fancy? Heck no. Does it clean my butt real good? Heck yes.
When I can afford a fancy heated, air drying bidet that will be my goalpost of success.
I started with a $30 cheapo 10 years ago and it was life changing. Last year I got a stupid expensive one. Like, has a night light, auto flush (because I got the matching toilet), auto lid, heated seat, heated water, deodorizer, wireless remote, etc. (Toto S7A)
Just so you’re prepared, the air dry doesn’t fully replace the pat dry entirely unless you’re gonna sit there for a good long time.
That said, I have no regrets.
Just so you’re prepared, the air dry doesn’t fully replace the pat dry entirely unless you’re gonna sit there for a good long time.
I just shake my ass off like a dog coming in out of the rain
Why is my ass always itching?
Because you don’t wash it, you dumbass.
Bidet with a quiet-close toilet seat 🧑🍳💋
Auto lid, auto flush checking in.
Yes, I’m spoiled.
Wiping like a pleb when you travel and slamming the seat.
I love spraying flecks of poo all over the handle so the next guy touches my poo flecks, very euro sanitary
Ew its a bidet, not an enema dude
Skill issue.
How would you even manage to do that?
When you spray your asshole with a high pressure stream of water it sends flecks of poo into the air
That’s why you don’t use 100% pressure from the beginning. You ease into it.
Also, your 're sitting down so your butt is literally covering the water from getting splashed in the air.
No it doesn’t.
Then why is my whole bathroom covered in a fine layer of poo flecks? Checkmate
Because you’re standing up while you use it, for some reason.
Anyone got bidets to recommend (full toilets or kit to install on top of current toilets)?
I feel like most are really expensive and I wouldn’t want to waste money on something too expensive or something bad
I got a Brondell bidet from Costco for like $80. It’s just the seat and it’s pretty fancy slick with how it self cleans and hides/reveals itself while having no electricity going on. Just have to make sure that if you want hot water you’ll have to connect it to the sink waterline. I didn’t do that and the cold wasn’t a problem after a few uses getting comfortable.
Worst case just return it if you don’t like it.
I got my Brondell bidet from Amazon and it cost $20.
Mine for reference: https://www.costco.ca/brondell-swash-cl99-non-electric-bidet-toilet-seat.product.100595924.html They raised the price :(
I got an $80 one from Home Depot. And it was the second best purchase i have made. It really didn’t have to be expensive… but i did try to buy one on Amazon… and it was designed to fail, so i recommend just going to get one at a store
I’ve brought bidets awesomeness in groups before.
It is immediately apparent who is “in the club” and who is not.
