• GHiLA@sh.itjust.works
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    1 month ago

    I’m a southerner. Take what I’m about to tell you as close to the grain of the problem as possible, because it is.

    Here’s the thing. 9 times out of 10, a Southern man is going to meet a lone trans or gay person, have a pleasant experience talking to them and go about their day, they even make friends with the person, spend years talking to them, send gifts, become family members, etc.

    But you know what?

    Behind closed doors, it’s “fuck those trannies”, “not in my schools”, etc. My mom does it, her sister does it, my dad did it. It’s hypocrisy at an extreme level while also ignoring it at an extreme level.

    “Well I have gay friends… I’m not homowhatzit”

    THEY’RE TEACHING WHAT!?

    “Double Standard” might as well be the tagline for the entire South. They’ll protect their religion and the expectations put on them by their parents and social norms on a general level across the board, while still shaking hands and eating cake with their lgbtq+ buddies.

    Just remember any southerner is one thought from God away from stabbing you in the back at all times, because no matter how close you get to them, even as a family member, that book and the expectations behind it means more, was beat into them more, every day since they were born until you met them.

    • scsi@scribe.disroot.org
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      1 month ago

      Your favorite search engine -> “bless your heart meaning” and good luck navigating the waters.

      • boonhet@lemm.ee
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        1 month ago

        I thought this was pretty universally known in the US because I’m not from the US and never been further south than NYC when I did visit, but even I have seen it in some movie and immediately picked it up based on the tone and connect. I mean it was pretty much “he said something incredibly stupid” -> “oh bless his heart” between some southern grandmas

        Might’ve been Big Mommas House, might’ve been something else entirely.

    • brucethemoose@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      100%

      My mom went to an integrated school in the South, made friends… but sometimes overheard racist slurs and threats behind closed doors. Same story with family I have now, all pleasent in public, friends with some gay family members. But vehemently anti-vaccine and such behind closed doors… I have horrible stories I can’t even repeat.

      The duality is unreal.

      A question is where that behind-doors comes from… a lot is from church. Church like you’ve never seen if you haven’t been to the South.