Actually fr! Studied a year there and I had no driver license back then… Which was fuckin painful as there was little to no other infrastructure! It was also fun to start uni with a 2 hour consultation about school shootings…
But the worst thing? They fucken start every conversation with a ‘how are you’ and look at you like you are boinkers if you say anything aside from ‘good’! Well I am not fuckin good at most times…
Lived in multiple eu countries as a contrast and its incomparably worse, while there is an amount of money I would go back temporarily but I would never settle down there
Ehhhhh, this is not standard in all places. If someone asks me how I am I will answer honestly but vaguely. “Living the dream, I’ve been better, meh, good, pretty good.” It’s common for other people to answer the same way, too. The part that’s not as socially acceptable is to go into detail about it if you don’t know the people well/people don’t have follow up questions about it.
Hell that’s regional even in the US. Most social interactions in the PNW used “What’s up!” in whatever variation to mean “Hi!” and “How’s it going/are you doing?” meant "Tell new how you’re feeling or how your day/task is progressing“. Honest answers were quite normal. The only people who were bothered were the bourgie types, and fuck 'em in any case.
We also just didn’t talk to unfamiliar people outside of social spaces if it could be helped.
You’ll be at work, walking the opposite direction as a co-worker who you are seeing for the first time that day. “How are you?” You can’t stop to talk, so you only have time for a 1-3 word answer max.
Hell I live in an area that asks it as a greeting and I don’t lie. Sometimes I sugarcoat it with “could be better” but like, no one ever makes me feel like a dumbass for being honest.
Then literally just say “could be better”. It’s the truth, and phrased in such a way that a stranger you’re exchanged pleasantries with doesn’t have to feel awkward about it.
I have a coworker who greets me with “Hi, what’s up? How’s it going?” and then just continue walking without expecting an answer. It’s such a pet peeve of mine, lol. We’re not Americans, we live in Europe, and this person is definitely an exception, but it still catches me off guard every single time.
You see, “how are you?” Isn’t a genuine quotation, it’s just a way of saying “hello” and feigning interest in someone’s well-being. In all actual fact, nobody gives a shit.
You don’t have to. It’s socially accepted and preferred if you do, but I have, and have had done to me, simply ignoring the question and moving the conversation forward to the point.
I live in Canada, we follow a lot of the same here, I try to be more genuine than the average and give a nonspecific but truthful response. Anything from “I’m having a day”, to “it could be worse”, or “not the worst” kind of deal. Basically setting a low bar for how I’m doing and saying I’m somewhere above that.
You don’t have to reply with “fine”, but it’s one of the fastest ways to end the greeting part of the conversation and move on to more important topics.
Actually fr! Studied a year there and I had no driver license back then… Which was fuckin painful as there was little to no other infrastructure! It was also fun to start uni with a 2 hour consultation about school shootings…
But the worst thing? They fucken start every conversation with a ‘how are you’ and look at you like you are boinkers if you say anything aside from ‘good’! Well I am not fuckin good at most times…
Lived in multiple eu countries as a contrast and its incomparably worse, while there is an amount of money I would go back temporarily but I would never settle down there
Wait, so y’all don’t have to lie and tell people you’re doing good? This is an American thing?
Ehhhhh, this is not standard in all places. If someone asks me how I am I will answer honestly but vaguely. “Living the dream, I’ve been better, meh, good, pretty good.” It’s common for other people to answer the same way, too. The part that’s not as socially acceptable is to go into detail about it if you don’t know the people well/people don’t have follow up questions about it.
Hell that’s regional even in the US. Most social interactions in the PNW used “What’s up!” in whatever variation to mean “Hi!” and “How’s it going/are you doing?” meant "Tell new how you’re feeling or how your day/task is progressing“. Honest answers were quite normal. The only people who were bothered were the bourgie types, and fuck 'em in any case.
We also just didn’t talk to unfamiliar people outside of social spaces if it could be helped.
Why would you do that ngl. If someone asks how I am, of course I tell the truth. If they don’t want to know, they shouldn’t have asked.
You’ll be at work, walking the opposite direction as a co-worker who you are seeing for the first time that day. “How are you?” You can’t stop to talk, so you only have time for a 1-3 word answer max.
“Not that great tbh, what about you?”
Hell I live in an area that asks it as a greeting and I don’t lie. Sometimes I sugarcoat it with “could be better” but like, no one ever makes me feel like a dumbass for being honest.
It’s also I don’t want to be a downer. If I were to answer honestly i’d say “i feel like shit”.
Then literally just say “could be better”. It’s the truth, and phrased in such a way that a stranger you’re exchanged pleasantries with doesn’t have to feel awkward about it.
You’re probably right.
“How are you?” is a greeting, not a question.
…Unless it’s from a close friend.
Well then the question mark is a lie
Are you supposed to answer it? Yes? So its a question wowsies…
No, you aren’t necessarily expected to answer. “Hi” is a totally normal and expected response, for example.
I’ve even seen it a lot that people don’t even reply to “how are you”, they just start talking about something else. So weird…
They interpreted it as [acknowledgement that they are aware of your presence], which it most likely is.
I have a coworker who greets me with “Hi, what’s up? How’s it going?” and then just continue walking without expecting an answer. It’s such a pet peeve of mine, lol. We’re not Americans, we live in Europe, and this person is definitely an exception, but it still catches me off guard every single time.
You see, “how are you?” Isn’t a genuine quotation, it’s just a way of saying “hello” and feigning interest in someone’s well-being. In all actual fact, nobody gives a shit.
Just say “fine” and move on.
I say “doing alright, how about you”l and that usually covers it
So you have to answer it? To what sort of languical constructs are you expected to answer?
You don’t have to. It’s socially accepted and preferred if you do, but I have, and have had done to me, simply ignoring the question and moving the conversation forward to the point.
I live in Canada, we follow a lot of the same here, I try to be more genuine than the average and give a nonspecific but truthful response. Anything from “I’m having a day”, to “it could be worse”, or “not the worst” kind of deal. Basically setting a low bar for how I’m doing and saying I’m somewhere above that.
You don’t have to reply with “fine”, but it’s one of the fastest ways to end the greeting part of the conversation and move on to more important topics.