Yeah I don’t think “being yourself” is a thing that anyone has to worry about. You can only ever be yourself.
As you point out, we’re social mammals. We always exist in a social context and the behaviors that benefit us are highly dependent on that context.
It’s also perfectly natural for our identities to change over time. We don’t “discover the real me” we adopt new identities that benefit us more. That’s just how being a human is.
I was at a Meyers-Briggs workshop one time (company-mandated) and the facilitator said something that made a lot of sense to me: “At any given time, your personality is about 33% who you want to be, about 33% who the people around you want you to be, and about 33% who you really are”.
I don’t put much stock in business astrology grifters myself 😆. But I definitely agree that we adapt our behaviors to the people we’re with and situations we’re in. And that how we want to be seen by others and the expectations of others both have a strong impact on the behavior we exhibit. I would strongly disagree with that last third though - we are always who we really are.
The behaviors we’re reluctant or incapable of changing around others are no more us than the behaviours that we have stronger insight into and control over.
Yeah I don’t think “being yourself” is a thing that anyone has to worry about. You can only ever be yourself.
As you point out, we’re social mammals. We always exist in a social context and the behaviors that benefit us are highly dependent on that context.
It’s also perfectly natural for our identities to change over time. We don’t “discover the real me” we adopt new identities that benefit us more. That’s just how being a human is.
I was at a Meyers-Briggs workshop one time (company-mandated) and the facilitator said something that made a lot of sense to me: “At any given time, your personality is about 33% who you want to be, about 33% who the people around you want you to be, and about 33% who you really are”.
I think we adapt based on our context.
It’s getting Jung up in here.
I don’t put much stock in business astrology grifters myself 😆. But I definitely agree that we adapt our behaviors to the people we’re with and situations we’re in. And that how we want to be seen by others and the expectations of others both have a strong impact on the behavior we exhibit. I would strongly disagree with that last third though - we are always who we really are.
The behaviors we’re reluctant or incapable of changing around others are no more us than the behaviours that we have stronger insight into and control over.