Would more men be open to going to therapy if they had resources tailored specifically for them, and if the office had Emotional Support Animals for appointment use?
Would more men be open to going to therapy if they had resources tailored specifically for them, and if the office had Emotional Support Animals for appointment use?
I’m a woman but due to my interests in traditionally masculine activities and general disinterest in conventional gendered behaviours, I hang around a lot of men. Most of my close friends have been men. From my experience, if men want to improve their mental health then they need to develop a better relationship with vulnerability and the shame they’ve been conditioned to feel around that.
Mental health stigma exists for everyone and as a society we need to fuck this right off. Mental health challenges are part of the human experience in the same way physical illnesses are and we need to support people accordingly. I’ve noticed that a lot of men tend to have issues with expressing their feelings out of fear of being vulnerable. The outdated myth that men are less emotional really doesn’t help this situation either. This can also create barriers for men in seeking mental health support, both formal and informal.
It needs to more okay for men to be vulnerable. All people are vulnerable and it doesn’t make you weak. All people need support at some point in their lives. Emotions are really hard and it’s better to recognise and acknowledge them than it is to push them down. Expressing vulnerability and overcoming difficult feelings shows bravery and strength.
Can you offer some examples of where “being vulnerable” led a man out of depression?
I do agree that there is a culture of masculine shame around mental health, and it can be unhealthy. But I’ve also seen that those who share their feelings don’t get the promotion, tend to make coworkers uncomfortable, drive women away. Life is still a competition and vulnerability is genuinely risky.
I’ve seen bullies strategically share false vulnerability to garner sympathy. Genuine vulnerability often looks gross from a man, and is unlikely to lead to positive outcomes.
Most importantly, this new wave of mental health problems is not caused by a new wave of “not being vulnerable.” It’s a societal issue and must be confronted there, not shunted onto each individual man.