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I prefer the phrase ‘giving a dump’, because I sure don’t seem to be taking anything away from the transaction.
Alas I have digressed. I too indulged in the literary expositions of the shampoo bottle. Conditioner only on Fridays.
I prefer the phrase ‘giving a dump’, because I sure don’t seem to be taking anything away from the transaction.
Alas I have digressed. I too indulged in the literary expositions of the shampoo bottle. Conditioner only on Fridays.
I operate in el camino reálity. Miss me with that ranchero and canyonero nonsense.
If I am not mistaken, according to the grammatical scrolls, having a chin makes everyone … chinese
Frakkin Cylons! I knew it!
You may attract python too!
Now, therefore, as president I shall urge the Congress to enact the Writ of Habeas Dorkus, requiring a person under the influence of cerebral diarrhea to be brought before some type of human greater than 4 and one-half years of age, especially to secure the person’s sufficient mental competence to be able to wipe their own ass without first tuning in to the TV for guidance, specific instruction, and moral support.
It’s just recliner theater, I tell ya!
Please run for congress. Now.
There is nothing on that seasonal display barge worth 150 dollary-doos. Or is there? What year is it and what’s the inflation rate?
I’m also mildly concerned about the handcuffs in the top-shelf plastic bin.
If that was the one with the built-in sharpener, that kid was ballin’
Why would one ever need to sharpen crayons? Why you ask? Because reasons!
Put a glide in your stride, and a dip in yo hip, and come on to the mothership
Why on earth would we try to make snakes faster? Science has gone too far this time. What’s next, give them arms?
"Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”
I much prefer Dunning-Notice-Krueger. I get a credit collections notice delivered by a guy with a metal-clawed glove. Now with Fedora!
The figure is somewhere above 0%, but certainly not zero. For example, haven’t you seen the crap blaster 9000 infomercial at 2AM on a Tuesday? You connect that bad boy to a fire hydrant (vendor liability disclaimed), pull the turbo-diesel engine rip cord, and wear a full body bio-hazard suit with air supply (suggested). Not for use with some sets. Batteries not included.
Ahh, sweet memories; sometimes they overflow.
You should hear the cries of the memories, right before they are garbage collected. “Wait, I need that!”
“Bring in the logic probe!”
The key to creamy cream - free soup - is hiding in your pantry. Because your kids had a tantrum and tore all the labels off of the cans you stocked up at the start of Covid lock-down, when society was surely going to crumble. Botulism roulette!
Browser: “Are you gonna order somethin’ kid!?” (all subsequent data streams to Google for future sale)
User: “Uh yeah, give me, gimme a tab.”
Browser: “A tab. I can’t give you a tab unless you order something!”
User: “But I’m jonesin for some saccharin … not that newtra-schweddy or whatever it is”
Biff Yaml enters; sits two spaces down, feeling sexagesimal: “What are you looking at, BUTTHEAD!?” (all of his comments are one line)
Python Strickland enters: "User what are you doing? Four spaces are used for indentation. You got a real attitude problem, user; you’re a slacker! You remind me of your dunder father when he went here; he was a slacker, too! Quack quack. (his package is poorly managed)
Linus Torvalds enters: heavy breathing … curses in Finnish (Älykääpiö!) … gits out
IBM Selectric: “Hold my beer … and my ball”
Obnoxious neighbor kid walks in (a real ascii): Invokes char(11)/VT; sits on the floor. His Mylar balloon flies away, hits a high voltage line, and the power goes out.
Browser: “Well, looks like the milkshake machine’s broken.”
Teletype Model 28 looks up from drinking coffee and reading the morning paper tape: “I would like to be … modified”
Doc Mill (nee’ Rampazetto) enters: (shudders) “Momma bollocks!”
During this time, Helium was on a noble mission and did not react.
You can tell it is fake because no human would tie up the tent door flaps using the little nylon fettuccine thingies they sew onto each side