I like the idea of you just sitting on your couch, suddenly looking around and slapping your knees to stand, just saying “WELP THAT DOES IT. I AIN’T LEARNING SHIT TODAY.”
I like the idea of you just sitting on your couch, suddenly looking around and slapping your knees to stand, just saying “WELP THAT DOES IT. I AIN’T LEARNING SHIT TODAY.”
Girlfriend:
[X] eats hot chip
[X] lie
I like thinking about cats as my little contract worker. We have a great relationship, but as soon as I ask him to wear a tie or show up to meetings, I very curtly and loudly am reprimanded and reminded that at the end of the day, he. is. a. contractor. and to go fuck myself
This sentence is incredible.
When I was 10/11 we went to Florida to visit family/go to the Disney world or land, water parks, etc… as Alaskans this was a big hot awesome vacation trip and we flew for a day and a half to get there.
Two cousins were there and they were the same age as my brother, around 13/14. It was swiftly decided that I wasn’t allowed to play with them or go anywhere with them. If we went swimming, all 3 would dunk me. One time we went to watch a rocket launch, and they were being so mean to me it made my mom start silently crying.
So, obviously, I went to Disney with everyone and experienced the entire park just me and my grandma, who needed to rest often.
It is worth mentioning that my father had died a year or so earlier.
Yeah, that vacation was really upsetting, I am 37 and still get depressed about it sometimes
I feel called out. I feel proud, but also sad. I feel proudsad. I feel prad.
I am embarrassed to say that I like thin crust papa johns, but only if it’s cold…? Although, I’ve only eaten it while hungover, so it’s obviously a crap “pizza” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
That’s 100% true. Same with frozen. Sometimes I just want some air fried digornos, not anything that was made with love shudder
It’s best for everyone that we just accept that they are two different pizza concepts, and should not be ranked between each other.
Audition (1999)… I haven’t watched it in 20 years but holy shit it is definitely in my collection of scary memories
“once one senses Trouble Gut, they must accept and nurture Trouble Butt…”
Only fools are positive
Maybe it’s “you are welcome (to ask me for help/favors, as I am neutral to the task. I might even enjoy it.)”
And “it’s not a problem (for me to do what you asked me to do; we have now both acknowledged that I have done something to help you that was not organic to me, but now we can move past it with no further conversation.)”
I bet “no problem” to some people is like seeing someone wear a T-shirt to church. They’d really prefer it if you would put on a suit and tie, even though the purpose of both are the same (cover my body when away from home because that is our current social agreement), because a T-shirt is disrespectful.
Also everyone sucks, it is a problem, and you are not welcome.
Both of you are idiots, I’ve been a caring and empathetic person my entire life!
My coworker and I had to rock-paper-scissors who hurt the most to go home early
They come in pints?? I’m getting one, you piece of shit.
Penis.
*Penis
OMG *PENIS
if you were actually around long enough there were literally polls of what to call Lemmy users. Lemons was actually the top name for a bit, but lemmings won out. So. Try not to be so needlessly mean. It was named Lemmy not just because of the animals called Lemmings, but also Lemmy from motörhead. that’s like two sentences into the Wikipedia page.