• Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    44
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    4 days ago

    Exactly! Why the fuck would anyone want to date someone that much younger than them? I will never understand why so many men want to date girl so young.

    • Soup@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      38
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      4 days ago

      A friend of friend I’ve met a couple times is into me. They’re 23 and I’m 30 and I still don’t have an interest. They’re perfectly nice, but…

      I think after 28-30 it starts to really not matter that much but before that even smallish gaps can be pretty questionable. And any dude that would consider someone their age to be a “hag” probably largely dates younger because mature, experienced women can tell they’re really just garbage man-children.

      • Revan343@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        13
        ·
        3 days ago

        really just garbage man-children

        It’s a green-text, we knew that from the get-go

        • Soup@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          4
          ·
          3 days ago

          Yes, but even people who don’t go online much, even people I actually do care about in my own life, still fall into that category. The people I care about tend to be much nicer and wouldn’t call someone a hag but they do lack a certain level of maturity. Green-text makes it near certain but it’s a “not all rectangles are squares” situation.

          • Steve Dice@sh.itjust.works
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            3 days ago

            Oh, but all rectangles are squares if we shoehorn a non-standard metric (this comment has absolutely nothing to do with the thread and it’s just a dumb math joke).

      • janewaydidnothingwrong@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        3 days ago

        I agree with this. For me, so so much integral growth happens between ages 20 and 26-28 or so, and I don’t really think people in general know who they are or what they want in life until then. Not true for everyone of course. All the people I know who married young are either divorced or super unhappy though so it may skew my perception a bit.

      • Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        edit-2
        3 days ago

        Oh 100%. I knew a guy that was my age, that was always trying to date younger, because no women our age would deal with his bullshit. So… I guess I do understand, huh.

      • SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        5
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        3 days ago

        For real. When I was 24, I dated a 19 year old for like two weeks. They were really nice and interesting, but ultimately the age gap proved to make a relationship unviable. I can’t even imagine a nine year gap at that age. Gross.

    • chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      3 days ago

      People are feeling all kinds of pressure these days. If they want to have kids they need a lot of resources. But having a lot of resources is really difficult to do when you’re young. So that naturally suggests a compromise: one old with resources and one young with health.

      • Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        9
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        3 days ago

        Wait, but I thought men hated “gold diggers”? And also, that’s the result of our fucked up late stage capitalism economic system and not how things should work. A young couple should be able to afford to live comfortably and have children if they want.

        • chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          7
          ·
          3 days ago

          People make life choices based on how things are, not how they ought to be.

          Generally a “gold digger” refers to a young woman who marries an elderly rich man with the intent of gaining a large inheritance, not a young woman who marries an established (but still working) man a few decades her senior with the intent of raising a family. A big “gold digger tell” is that the rich guy already has adult children who end up in a feud with his new young wife (because she represents a threat to their inheritance).

          • Ashenlux@lemmy.blahaj.zone
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            2
            ·
            3 days ago

            Oh really? I thought it ment a women marring for money in general.

            People can do what they want, but women shouldn’t have to feel like they have to marry some dude a decade older just to have a decent life and start a family. That’s all I’m saying.

        • Holytimes@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          Some men love gold diggers my uncle is one such man. In his own words “gold digger are the easiest lay”.

          It’s fucked beyond measure

      • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        3 days ago

        What I mean I’ve been alive a long time. I’m not sure how I was supposed to accrue resources through that though.

        Also who wants to date a 19 year old they’d be really annoying.

        • chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          The question is “why would anyone want to date someone much younger than them (presumably up to a couple decades)?” not specifically about dating a 19 year old.

          Not everyone can accrue a bunch of resources over time of course. But your odds of doing so are much better in your working years than when you’re in school.

        • daggermoon@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          3 days ago

          Honestly, because i’m a 20 something year old man with no life experiences and I don’t know how to survive on my own. Someone older with more experience who would be willing to teach me would be nice. It’s a big ask I guess. I don’t really know what else to do. I’m lonely and i’d like to meet someone kind, caring, and beautiful who can be a friend, lover, and teacher if you will. I haven’t told anyone this because it makes me sound desperate and like a lost cause.