He could just use water from a well nearby, right?
All hail the artists mark!
A favourite prank - True Story:
Guy from Québec goes to southern US for work. Thick accent and very catholic. Befriends locals, but finds the trope about ignorance to be … deserved.
At bar after work, locals try to explain Christianity to him. He plays dumb and trolls EXPERTLY.
Merican - So Jesus died for our sins and came back to life.
Qué: Like le zombie?
Merican: Well, no. Not like that. But he showed his friends the holes in his hands to prove it was him and he really died.
Qué: Oui! Like le zombie. Wounds on hands from 'ow he died and fleshrotting off face…
Merican: No no nothing like that.
Qué: But he died? (Yup) For real? (Yup) But got back up? (yes) With wounds. (Yes). So 'ow eez dis not like le zombie?
Merican: I’m just not explaining it well. (Story goes on) Gets to transubstantiation. Take this bread and eat of my flesh. Take this cup and drink of my blood … and you shall have everlasting life.
Qué: Mais oui! You See. Like le zombie! He eat your flesh. I see many movie like dis.
Merican: No! Sorry, I’m not explaining it well. Jesus doesn’t eat your flesh. He wants you to eat his, symbollically.
Qué: Ohhh! I see now. Everlasting life? (Yes) So zombie Jesus feed you his zombie flesh and blood, so you turn into zombie like him and be undead forever. Are all Americain in dis zombie cult?
Merican: 😬🥵 well, when you put it like that I guess it does sound pretty weird.
My mom never appreciates me wishing her a happy Zombie Jesus Day on Easter.
He could’ve just peed into a jug instead, and then turned that into wine, right? I mean, it’s mostly water.
For that matter, so is wine …
If Jesus turns the water in wine to wine, what do you get?
Brandy?
Wine-ception.
event horizon
Stronger wine
So are people…
I saw this comic once where Jesus could turn that water into wine, thereby effectively killing people.
What a way to go though… drunk AF and a great story to tell in the afterlife about how you died. :-P
Wonder what they would have called Data? Still ugly, of course, but he’s certainly not a bag of mostly water!
Are you sure that his bodily systems aren’t heat-sunk with water as a coolant?
Possible, although it’s never been revealed. He’s always looked very dry when opened up.
True, though any engineer capable of the delicate manufacture of a positronic brain should be a master of cable management.
Don’t be silly, Jesus didn’t pee, he was the lamb of God. Or some stupid shit.
Did anyone bright snacks?
Wait a minute! Jes…
“And some bread to go with it.”
“and don’t spill my seed on the ground”
Let the heathens spill theirs on the dusty ground
You forget to remove the ad, friends don’t infest each other screens with ads.
No worries thou, I did it for you:
Why did you use JPG instead of transperant PNG or even SVG?
It’s visible in both light and dark mode.
Hey, that’s not cool. Always show the artist
Are you actually this dense or is this some weird unfunny bit you’ve committed yourself to?
