And muesli is a superior version of overnight oats, and you should give it a try because it adds fruit and a lot of different nuts.

Toss in some Greek yogurt, maybe some honey or maple syrup for flavor and sweetness, and it is freakin’ delicious.

And if you’re interested, it’ll make you regular as all hell.

Bomb pop, 100%.

The floor can because of gravity.

What’s gravity?

It is what causes everything to fall down.

Why does it do that?

Because everything weighs something, and the more something weighs, the more it causes other things to be drawn towards it.

Why does that happen?

It’s the way the universe is made. If it weren’t for that, the world wouldn’t exist.

Why wouldn’t the world exist without gravity?

Because without gravity, nothing would stick together.

What is nothing?

Nothing is what you see when you close your eyes, but you’re not there to look at it.

Side note, i’m honestly looking forward to having kids. I cannot wait to have an inquisitive child asking me questions that I could have never thought of myself.

That cat is like, as soon as you let me out of this, I am gonna shit in your cereal.

We could gender swap it and go with, like, a Karen who snaps because her coupon doesn’t get accepted because it’s one day expired.

And she just snaps and starts running people over in her SUV, pulling a gun on her kid’s teacher because the teacher gave her son a D when the Karen believes her kid should have gotten an A.

I know that sounds pretty idiotic, but like, Michael Douglas snapped because he wasn’t able to get a McDonald’s breakfast at 9:31.

I think it depends on your skill level in dual wielding.

I had a bottle taken from me because the bottle was rated for 250 milliliters, even though it only had about 30 in it, and it was translucent, and you could see how little liquid was actually in the bottle.

It was on a return flight as well, so I had already flown in with the bottle, but I was not allowed to fly back out with it.

Hope they all got nice pay raises for the hassle.

What do you mean bizarre? Wishbone was amazing.

It’s such a quotable movie!

No disassemble!

Tu mama haci el amore co mi perro

Johnny’s in the tunnel with Oscar…

None, if I love something, I have no shame about it.

Adding more water allows it to remain mostly water after nuking it to fucking death.

They were always stupid, social media made them bold.

You know, it’s generally recommended to, like, put a little water on the potato before you microwave it to prevent the plate from exploding from heat.

Yeah, give Mexico City a try. It’s very much the same, only not so financially out of reach. You can get an okay house there for like $70,000 so you can buy a $2.5 million mansion. It’s up to you and what kind of money you have.

I’m just coming back off of three weeks there and holy crap what a difference between America and Mexico.

Every street corner has foot traffic. There are shops every two city blocks for a 20 mile radius. There’s a variety and art and culture, and everyone’s just taking it easy. No one’s in a big rush, even when their traffic is absolutely insane, it’s insanity that’s dealt with with a logical mind.

Culturally, America is 100 years behind Mexico City.

Say a hundred bucks? I sincerely hate losing money, so if I gamble, it’s always with a very limited amount of money, and once it’s gone, it’s gone.

Why is it in English then that familiarity breeds contempt?

Speak for yourself. My bosses are all 50 plus year old perverts, so they’re only hiring incredibly attractive women.

Sometimes going into work sucks for me the way it might feel for a goblin sewer cleaner to walk out into the city.

I feel like most of the internet is being used as a psy-op on the populace.

In the Arabian Nights, the genie tended to grant people’s wishes as they were intended, and without any trickery.

The trickery of the djinn is something that has been retconned into the system.

If they didn’t like you, they would just kill you right away.

And also technically Aladdin got a second genie originally with just a small ring that granted him unlimited wishes in the form of servitude.