What qualities do you covet?
That I was as socially confident as other people seem to be, I don’t care if it’s all a facade, I want to be able to use the facade.
What helps me is knowing that everyone is fucking awkward.
I’ve met thousands upon thousands of people and I have never met anyone who is not socially awkward, just a lot of people who are socially skilled in different ways.
The people who don’t come across as awkward are the people who acknowledge their awkwardness and own it, who give themselves an opportunity to fumble with their awkwardness and to get used to it the same way you do with any other difficult thing like math or reading or studying or dance or games.
I said all of that to say, not being awkward is not a talent, it is a skill, and you can learn it.
Like with most skills, one becomes confident with practice.
I’m a natural introvert and an only child and therefore has little practice of taking to others. I had no idea of how important small talk is. I learned by working in a bar, where social interaction can’t really be dodged and found out that social interaction isn’t that daunting as it seemed to me.
It still not my biggest hobby yet I’m not longer afraid of social interaction like I used to be.
To not procrastinate.
I’ll comment on this later.
If it was me (which it was), I’d set a reminder and then every time I got a notification, I’d push it off until later. Also, I’d hate my(past)self for making the commitment to have to deal with the notifications.
Ugh, notifications to do something are the worst! My notification to pay my credit card comes up and I’m like, just leave me alone already! I’ll do it tomorrow!
I wish I was happy. Not even all of the time, just some?
Ugh, I feel this. I’m just so done.
Be able to draw fast. I’m hilariously slow at drawing 😂
Stay out of the wild West
I wish I was more Christlike.
No matter what you believe about Christianity, you can’t deny that He is a pretty good role model.
Fuckin guy had balls of titanium. Could tell off the cops to their faces and walk away.
Though it did catch up with him.
I mean He did have the last laugh
I’m a particular fan of the “flipping the tables of the vendors at the temple” behavior.
That was pretty based
Tbh, saying “come feel my wound, bro” is a metal as hell way to respond to Thomas
I sometimes wish I could be social without feeling mentally and physically drained.
Same, its always seems to take a toll no matter how well it goes or how much I like the others
I wish I was a dog for real.
Honestly, I’m not even a furry but it has to be exhilarating to be a big wolf or cat.
Imagine being a rich white woman’s house cat. Best life in the solar system.
I wish I were less anxious/self-conscious. It’s weird because outwardly almost no one knows that I am. I’m charismatic and easy to talk to, a natural leader in the workplace (I’ve managed now at every job I’ve held) and I’m a loving and supportive father. But deep down I’m still self-conscious as hell. I experience a lot of spotlight syndrome and I feel like I dress frumpy, walk weird, etc. I have a lot of social anxiety and think every situation/confrontation is going to be a worst-case scenario. Had to take 5 weeks off of work for a stress fracture and allowed myself to believe leading up to it that my (typically supportive) boss was going to be angry or petty or challenge me over it. He was extremely supportive and told me to just take the time off and not to worry about putting out the fires at work.
I don’t know how I conditioned myself to be like this. Probably a side-effecting of growing up fat and all the self-hate that came with it. I got rid of the fat a lot time ago, but I don’t think that shit ever really left me. Fortunately my daughter does not share my lack of confidence. That kid is miles ahead of her peers and I’m so proud of her.
I wish I was worth peoples’ time.
You are! The people that make you feel you aren’t, aren’t worth your time 😉
I’m great, so I wish I had more money.
Wish I could negotiate and haggle, I just don’t want to, it doesn’t feel good to me. I’d rather accept or refuse the offer and move on.
Do you tend to struggle with people pleasing as well or is it limited to negotiation?
It’s more to do with honesty. If the seller says it’s worth this much and that’s what they need to charge to cover their costs, then I would like to think that’s true because if it isn’t, they’re lying.
I think this might be where it comes from for me, too. If you say it’s with x, and I think it’s worth z, I don’t want to insult you or assume you’re trying to scam me by asking for x, but I also don’t want to pay much more than z.
The concept of some mystical “y” living in the middle is lost to me and it’s socially impossible to reach “y” without me calling you a scammer or you calling me cheap, so no deal will be made today.
Yes that’s exactly it!
Limited to negotiation.
Wish I wasn’t depressed and anxious so I could do what normal people seem to do normally every they meanwhile it takes me a week if I have better episode.
Good health. But alas.
I wish I didn’t have an addictive personality. I just wanna be a casual heroin user, is that too much to ask for? I don’t want to sell my mom’s TV for another hit rather have a job and pay for my own scores. Ya know responsibly
I don’t think think its necessarily an addictive personality that makes one susceptible to heroin. Heroin (especially in the format its consumed) is basically pure pleasure/heaven all at once since all the RoA are all IV/snort/smoke, anyone would end up with a problem after like a week.
Can I ask what heroin seems to be acting as a balm or buffer for?
Not having any signs or traits of being neurospicy
I feel that. I wish I was neurotypical, cis, and mentally well :(
I’m seeing that word come up moreadays. What do you mean by it?
It’s a tongue in cheek way of referring to neurodivergence. The same way that someone might refer to neurotypical as neurobland.
Its funny cuz I’m quite vanilla but I’m not neurovanilla
