• peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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    4 months ago

    Is that really a feature of ADHD?

    I mean it explains a lot I’m just surprised.

    I thought I just hated the idea of people thinking they have authority for “reasons.”

    No, officer bob, pointing the pistol at my head does not give you the authority to take my money. Just because you are threatening me with lethal force and will likely face no legal consequences, does not actually mean you have the right to demand the money I worked hard at obtaining in my hands. That’s basically school yard bullying. And before you get all bent out of shape, yes, I earned this because it’s not easy to walk out of a bank with everyone’s cash. You just stuck a gun in my face. Hope you feel good with the power trip you theiving bastard.

    • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      I think the “hating being told what to do” leans a little toward the ASD side of ADHD. The difficulty dealing with transitions that trigger anxiety and frustration when being shifted out of a routine.

      You’re doing what you’re doing and focused on it, in the groove, then someone inserts something between you and the goal you were aimed at and completely destroys your flow.

      It can really be pretty angering.

      • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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        4 months ago

        That doesn’t quite match up with my experience.

        I have no routines. Or maybe I have a routine that’s super haphazard. To normal people it doesn’t look like a routine.

        When I get interrupted, on say something that needs my focus and my meds help me focus on, I can switch.

        This is not that. It’s not change, it’s not interruption. I find the concept of authority to be meaningless unless everyone plays by the same rules, which clearly is not the case.

        So when authority presents itself, I find the most pleasurable response to something obnoxious is being obnoxious. And that’s probably the ADHD part.

        • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          You don’t have to have a routine, it can be something that you’re very focused on. ADD and ASD both can have hyperfocusing going on.

          Not everyone will have difficulty switching. We don’t all have the same wiring. I don’t hyperfocus, but if someone/-thing shifts me from my path to a goal it can be incredibly irritating, more than l think is “normal”.

          Authority (IMO) is difficult because it’s almost always hypocritical, and plays favorites. The concrete thinker views it as “I do the job right I get credit”. The authority rewards the schmoozer who takes 3 hour lunches and cadged everyone elses’s work instead. Or… authority says go do thing. This is how thing is done per training. You go to do thing per standard, but can’t because the correct tools aren’t available or time constraints, or everyone else says do it different to get it done on time. Everyone knows it’s done different without correct tools/procedure, including authority. Thing goes wrong, and authority punishes for not doing thing per procedure even though there was no reasonable way to do so within the limits given.

          Authority sucks, but IMO “normal” people are better at playing the game, whereas concrete thinkers reject the hypocrisy or find the schmoozing necessary in office politics difficult and reject it as a reflection of the job at hand.

          Anyway. My whole family is non-normative. Everyone’s different. Some things are shared traits, others are unique to the individual. Nobody really fits neatly into a single label.

        • Soggy@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          That sounds more like ODD to me, though Autism sometimes comes with a fierce sense of justice (because things have to Make Sense) and I don’t know your personal neurospicy Chex Mix.

          • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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            4 months ago

            According to the psych the only things that line up well with ASD are my masking symptoms which are indistinguishable from ADHD masking. Well and my generalized anxiety.

            The big commonly talked about things- black and white thinking, narrow interests, behavior camouflaging, ignorance of social cues, or flat affect are absent.

            Though interestingly my exwife has all of that, and it didn’t occur to me until after we moved apart. She was hot, I was young, young men tend to ignore obvious problems until it’s way too late.

      • considine@lemmy.ml
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        4 months ago

        ASD being autism spectrum disorder and that flow breaking is an issue for people on the spectrum?

  • Xanthrax@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I put a calendar widget, an alarm widget, and google keeps widget on my phone’s homescreen. It helps a lot when it’s the first thing I see. I also use Nova Launcher to make everything more aesthetically pleasing, which helps incentives me to use them. I also love true black backgrounds for OLED screens (one less distraction and saves battery).

    • kassiopaea@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      4 months ago

      I have my calendar on my home screen and I just ignore it because now it’s just part of the scenery. The only thing that actually helps me remember things is having a smart watch with alarms because I don’t ignore the haptics on my wrist.

      Remembering to keep it charged though? That’s a whole other thing.

      • Xanthrax@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        I do that, too. I bought a USB power bar that sits on my nightstand, so I’m more likely to charge my devices. Do you ever get “ghost notifications”? Like, your pocket or wrist feels like it’s vibrating, and you perk up?

        • kassiopaea@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          4 months ago

          Yeah I have my chargers on my nightstand and I put my phone on the charger every night no problem, but my watch and ring (I have an Oura) I want to wear at night (for the haptic alarm that doesn’t wake my partner, and sleep tracking); so a lot of nights I end up laying in bed on my phone for 30+ minutes past when I wanted to go to sleep just waiting for them to charge enough.

          Also, I used to occasionally have phantom notifications but now that I think about it I don’t think I have for a while. 🤷

    • NeatoBuilds@mander.xyz
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      4 months ago

      I forget how phones look after using kiss launcher for a few years now and everything is text based seeing icons makes me so confused

      • Xanthrax@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        I love KISS Launcher! I remember when it first came out, I immediately made myself a pipboy using an online tutorial.

        I only stopped using it once android started enabling widget customization. Dropping it mildly increased performance on my phone, but I’m cheap, so my hardware isn’t the best.

  • ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    The worst part is when people you work with wanna hangout after work because you seem like a pretty interesting person and you have to find a million reasons to avoid doing so lest they find out that when you leave work you become the most boring sedentary person alive outside of agoraphobes.

    • Delphia@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Depends on the workplace.

      I deal well with my job because I walk in and get told “Get this done today” and then I get left the hell alone to get it done. The boss knows better than to micromanage me or I deliberately drag chain.

      Leave the highly caffeinated lunatic to his job and shit gets done. Derail my process and chaos will happen.

  • AnimalsDream@slrpnk.net
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    4 months ago

    I was watching that ADHDVision channel on YouTube, and the whole time being like, “Wow this person is making so much sense, this is kind of mindblowing.”

    Then I got to a video where he started talking about his program to organize group video chat sessions between ADHDers to work together as accountability partners, and was like, “Wow that would be so effective… but fuck that.”

  • big_fat_fluffy@leminal.space
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    4 months ago

    But normies basically do everything they’re told. I mean that’s their whole reality. They don’t even have individual mind. They are embedded in the hivemind like pebbles embedded in a glacier. All of their morals, thoughts, desires … are just a product of the hivemind.

    You don’t want to be like that. That’s fucked. That’s a zombie holocaust.

    What we want is ADHD with good self-discipline. Is that oxymoronic?