I’m feeling pretty emotional and crap rn. I spent a stupid amount of money among other things… I feel disgusting and ugly.
(Please delete if not allowed)
Hey, rant out.
The world is dumb and crazy.
Why do you feel that way?
I explain why in the post I made just before this one.
Thank you. I feel so sad right now. And bad that I feel sad. I want to be a happy positive force. A light worker like people in my family. But I’m just a disappointment and I stink.
Oh, I see. I’ve been doing OMAD for 8 years or so and also like fasting for longer periods occasionally, but I don’t want you ending up somewhere you don’t want to be.
Dry fasting can be dangerous and you are not a freak for breaking a fast; we call it breakfast for a reason and I’m not being glib.
Your reasons for fasting sound externally empathetic at the expense of your own health and a better balance for yourself may be available.
It’s okay to eat and it’s okay to buy things you don’t need sometimes.
We’re all learning, I don’t see any reason from your posts for you to be upset with yourself, it doesn’t sound like you did anything wrong, but it’s perfectly okay to be upset. You don’t sound like a disappointment or a stinker.
OMAD for 8 years is amazing.
I don’t think it’s at the expense of my own health since I feel better for it and I am drawn to it for a reason. It feels healing. There’s so much food noise for me it’s practically all I think about and I hate that.
I suppose I feel the need to hide the fact that I did this. It feels too indulgent and it’s too much of a consistent thing for me, bad habit. I’ve never dry fasted that long before though.
Doing what I’ve just done feels like I’ve just diseased myself and put my family in jeopardy. Sounds dramatic but eating in this state feels wrong. I don’t feel truly grateful as I know I could be. I understand how this could sound damaging but it’s my truth. I feel sick and like I’m not letting my body properly heal everytime I eat or drink something.
I will say, I am doing OMAD rn. What you are describing sounds like a very significant eating disorder.
You say you dry fasted for 60 hours. The most obvious problem here is that the human body can die from dehydration at around 72 hours, or sooner, without water.
You say you fasted for 60 hours and then “failed”. How long were you intending to fast? I doubt that basically any medical professional, even proponents of IF, would recommend fasting indefinitely for fat loss.
Feeling better when you are in ketosis is normal. I suggest that if you are chasing this feeling with increasingly long fasts, that instead you simply switch to a ketogenic diet. Or take up distance running.
Eating after 60 hours of no food would not be considered indulgent by anyone. Eating food is a normal function of literally every animal species - you are not diseased. The idea that eating food is endangering your family is, to be frank, delusional.
To be clear, there is nothing wrong with having a desire to lose bodyfat, nor to pursue reasonable strategies to doing so. However, here is the secret: one of the biggest drivers of gaining and keeping bodyfat is stress. So if you are constantly stressed about being fat, you will keep the fat on. The most important thing for you to do right now is to talk to a mental health professional about the emotions you are experiencing and discuss your current body comp strategies with them. It will be far better for both your health and your long-term bidy comp goals
Heavy on the can die. There are probably people who could die at 24 hours depending on the circumstances.
I am happy that I made it that far. Further than ever before. I have done 72 hours once but with water and black coffee though. But there was shame around how I ended it…(for reasons I won’t fully go into rn). I would like to get to 7 full days and I know I can and will even feel better for it. Someone else may have a completely different response than me if they try that but I know deep in my bones that it will be healing for me regardless of what anyone says. I know it’s been done before by others too.
I guess it’s a combination of the amount I spent and on what that feels indulgent along with that I wasn’t actually hungry etc. and about it endangering my family, it does sound far fetched or quite extreme of a statement but it feels true and I won’t go into why or how right now.
Yes. It is about stress and for some like me, eating is a stressor. Alongside talking to a professional which honestly I can’t see myself doing atm.
Sorry, my internet apparently died at the least opportune moment and I just saw my last reply didn’t go through. I think I said roughly:
OMAD works for my body: saves time, guts don’t go nuts. I do OMAD because it makes things easier for me: it’s healthy for me and my life circumstances.
Eating doesn’t sound wrong if you’re putting your family in jeopardy by fasting. Eating sounds like the right way to go.
Truth can be damaging, your truth and self-harm don’t have to be exclusive.
I’m glad we’re talking. Talking about it more could help; perspective and expression is often helpful.
What I meant was by spending all that money and eating when I didn’t need to I was putting my family including myself in jeopardy.
Maybe one day I’ll get to OMAD too.
If you’ve gone several days without eating or drinking, it sounds like you needed to spend that money.
I’m happy you did spend that money and ate and drank; it sounds like the right decision.
Money can be earned again. Treat it as a learning experience. We all do things we regret later. Don’t stress over it, just assure yourself that you’ve got the lesson and it’s going to make you a better person because you’re wiser now
Oof, girl. (?)
While I’m not a doctor, I’d expect that 60 hours of fasting would have as great an effect on your brain as several alcoholic drinks. Of course you’d be struggling with impulse control afterwards!
It’s a huge accomplishment to just say “wow, I did something I don’t like having done and don’t want to do it.” I’d still have an older brother if fully grown adults were universally capable of saying “I should stop this” and then doing just that.
From your last several posts I’d guess that you’re trying a ketogrnic diet / intermittent fasting for weight loss reasons. If so, remember that the length of a fast or time-on-diet doesn’t matter nearly as much as your weekly caloric net. Maybe plan for how you want your fast to end, so you’re not figuring out something with a glucose-starved brain?
Whatever the case, you seem brave and strong and are definitely worth this. A setback isn’t a failure, just a discovery of some way that doesn’t quite work. :)
What do you need?
You matter and you’re valuable, no matter what crap happens
If it’s true that your relationship with food isn’t the greatest, I also suggest seeking professional help, if that’s an option right now. In Germany there are assisted living facilities for women with debilitating eating disorders that the state pays for. And some of them are actually really good. I’d think if you’re in the UK, they probably exist there as well, if walk-in therapy isn’t enough.
Truly, wish you well.
Just learn from your mistakes and move forward. There’s no other way.
Rule 3 of this community asserts that posts asking for mental help or therapy are disallowed. For that reason, I have reported this post. There is nothing wrong with the post—just choose an appropriate community next time.
Having said that, I hope that you are well, and I wish you the best. If you need mental help, please seek a qualified therapist and/or trusted friend.
