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Who says no to the random meat? The surface is largely inconsequential, unless it’s shit or uranium or somesuch.
vegetarians, probably
I’d eat vegetarians even though they’d probably be tough and bitter.
grass-fed long pig
A stranger once offered my wife a bag of raw kangaroo meat as a thank you for helping them. We have no idea where they got kangaroo meat, as we live in Canada.
She accepted it, but by the time she got home it looked highly suspicious and we didn’t eat it :(
use uranium to serve charcuterie, meat heats up, no one wants hot fuet and melted cheese :(
and they all died of radiation poisoning, the end
Random? I’m not seeing a 15 kg slab of raw horsemeat, no charred emu leg hanging off the side, no half digested contents of crocodile stomach, no unidentifiable roadkill from somewhere in Georgia (the country, not the state, but the state will do, too), no puréed human back meat, not even so much as a speck of walrus, ostrich, cassowary, kangaroo, or beluga; guess otters, marmot, geese, dog and cat (I don’t like it either, but they did say “random” ffs) don’t count as having meat…
The fuck do you mean, random? That shit’s about as well ordered as the unabridged Oxford English Dictionary, ffs.
Random might not be the right word, can we settle on “anonymous”?
It sounds a bit sinister, sure, but underscores the whole don’t-ask-don’t-tell nature of the contents of charcuterie nicely.
Given that language is prescriptive, “random” has, at least in regards to colloquial usage, rather lost its dictionary definition of “made, done, happening, or chosen without method or conscious decision”. Hell, I use it colloquially, as well. There’s nothing wrong with this usage.
I’m just trying to provide a bit of a humorous comparison between the usages by somewhat demonstrating what the charcuterie might look like if the dictionary definition was to be used, instead.
How about “arbitrarily chosen”?
Assorted meat? Meat arrangement? Selected meats? Meat clusterfuck? So many choices.
It’s a slate.
Looks like one of them shark coochie boards
This also bothered me.
More accurately it is a Melamine platter. We use this exact type and design in our catering op.
Soon as I saw those ripples I knew platter!
Yeah, way better than some boring old board!
I’ve recently come to realize if you eat everything in a sandwich individually on a board it’s 10x fancier.
100x if you add 3-4 grapes around the edges.
Here they’ve opted for olives, which seems surprising to me. Maybe they pair better with meat than grapes, dunno. Would eat
Grapes? Or assorted gourmet jellies? Possibly including grape?
Honestly, life would be improved if people brought everything on fancy wooden planks. I would replace FedEx and UPS in a heartbeat if my stuff arrived like that instead of being spiked onto the ground like a volleyball.
Cheeeeeeese!!!
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Portable sandwich bar
yes to both
