Rice is great if you’re really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.
RIP Mitch hedberg
It’s one of the few foods I can fully indulge. I want to eat two thousand of everything.
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So get this
We have Long Grain Rice like the Australian Doongara variety and Indian Basmati variety, Medium Grain, and we also have Short Grain Rice some varieties of which are quite wide, such as Bomba Rice.
I think Bomba’s probably what you’d be interested in.
Rice with the husk on seems larger and has more nutrients to carbs ratio but it’s not very tasty. Probably the largest overall grain is called “Tilda Giant Wild Rice”.
Baked rice?
Mashed rice?
Frenched fried rice?
Stuffed rice?
Rice Au Gratin… …the list is endless…
Yet the list ended. It’s fine. Aight? /s
For medium sized rice, consider mochi or tteokbokki.
That parable about the emperor asking for double the number of grains on each successive square of a chess board would be fucked of rice grains were that big.
Not like its easy with rice the size of rice
Yeah, that’s like… 250 billion tons of rice. That’s over 30 tons of rice per person in this world. Not sure this much rice even exists on this planet.
We humans never stop innovating
We would need a couple centuries to figure out how to cook it.
I mean what do you even do? Boil em? Mash em? Put them in stews?
How had Hobbits, with countless meals in one day, never stumbled upon the simple Roast?
Nah just skip the drying process after you harvest it and sell it fresh.
If rice becomes large enough to eat by ones and twos, will we start calling a single grain a rouse?
I’d like to see what rice would look like after a few hundred years of selecting for grain size
So that’s why it’s called a potato ricer.
Well, it’s not large rice, but we do have large Teosinte.
Y’all need more glutinous rice based cakes in your life!
Tteobokki is easily accessible as it’s Korean and trendy. But it’s just the beginning of that delicious side of rice!
In China they had delicious variations. Salty and sweet alike. 粢饭糕 (zifangao) were a bit big. Fishstick sized. Deep fried. I usually had them as a dessert but the rice itself is neutral so it would work salty as well no doubt. Main thing is to eat it while it’s hot, with a crunchy outside and the inside almost creamy.
But my favourite were the sliced nian gao. Imagine a roll of soft rice dough, ovalish in shape section. Cut in slices and those you can either fry or eat En sauce, like gnocchi really. Fantastic stuff!
Dammit I wish those were more accessible in Europe T_T
Tteobokki will have to do I guess.
Fuck Reddit and Fuck Spez.
