• some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org
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    3 days ago

    When I was around 20yo, I spent a summer with a new group of friends pretending I knew everyone’s names. It was anxiety hell. Today, I realize that I can just admit that I forget names and ask and it’s no problem. But that was an interesting summer.

    • CodandChips @lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      When I first started work I was in shop where there were three Bills, two Phil’s and two Neil’s . I never ever worked out who was who.

    • ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca
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      3 days ago

      Bro, homie, dawg, phil

      It’s easy to go years without knowing names, better if you don’t use that last one

  • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
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    4 days ago

    A month? I’ve known guys for years and still don’t know their names and it is WAY too late to ask.

    • credo@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      That’s when you figure out a reason to hand them a clipboard and say, “Imma need you to sign in.”

  • atro_city@fedia.io
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    4 days ago

    For real. Came into work for six months and talked to this dude about a bunch of stuff every time. Only a week ago did I find out his name. Now I can finally say his name instead of starting off with “hey bro”

    • u/lukmly013 💾 (lemmy.sdf.org)@lemmy.sdf.org
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      4 days ago

      At least you remember names. Someone can tell me their name, I’ll repeat it as suggested, forget it a few days later anyway.

      I’ll remember a phone number before someone’s name.

      Hell, I remember one dude as initials + his age when I met him. I don’t know why. Example: If I met John Doe aged 32, there’s a chance I’d remember him as “JD32”, and forget his actual name.
      Shout-out to MK22, I forgot your name again.

      • devfuuu@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        I have a friend who has a lot of friends. Sometimes we hangout together, but rarely. I cannot for the life of me remember their names and I swear 3 of them look the fucking same to me. It’s always a struggle to keep pretending for hours until I finally hear someone call one of them by name. I remember that for a few hours. If we hangout again next day it resets out of my head again.

  • Bob@feddit.nl
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    3 days ago

    It’s happened to me a few times over the years, but if anything it’s an opportunity to think up a nickname. Sometimes they stick and all.

  • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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    4 days ago

    Jfc, if you knew how long it has taken me to know the names of some of my friends, and not just work friends or gym friends, it would be absurd.

    Hell, even after months of hanging with someone, you might not know their last name; it’s all “hey, I’m zipper”. Why zipper? “I dunno, you know how it is”. Yeah, I feel that. Anyway, went a beer, zip?

    My chronic pain/disability support group shares space with an autism support group. Not a single one of the autism group knows my actual name afaik, but we’ll hang out down the road at a diner some nights as a mixed group when we’re meeting at the same time. It’s all “hey, beard!” And “sasquatch, wanna see my cat?” And sometimes just “man”. I’ve known some of them for years and we don’t know each other’s actual names. A couple of them, I’ve been to their house, and vice versa, and we don’t know each others last name at all.

    One guy in specific came over, heard my wife call out my name and was confused as hell because my name sounds like a regular word and thought it was a different nickname. Asked for the story behind it, and I had to show him my driver’s license because he thought I was fucking with him. We’d had dinner together at the diner dozens of times.

    No need for real names when you’re bros

    • MutilationWave@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      After fucking around for a while turned into being exclusive for about six months, the woman who is now my wife realized that we didn’t know each other’s last names. If she hadn’t brought it up it’s hard to tell how long I would have gone not knowing.

    • Tankton@lemm.ee
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      4 days ago

      Excellent point, if you’re just 1 on 1 with someone you dont need their name except to talk about them with someone else.

      • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world
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        3 days ago

        I’m always terrible with names but they do come in handy

        Hey,who’s working ____'s shift Thursday?

        Who do I need to talk to in HR?

        who makes the schedule?

        Ask ___ if they can cover your shift.

        Email ____ for me and see if they have a copy of that report.

        Can you tell ___ to come see me.

    • LandedGentry@lemmy.zip
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      4 days ago

      Or to show that you paid attention to anything they said about themselves and didn’t just wait your turn to talk. You know, basic social etiquette lol

  • affiliate@lemmy.world
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    4 days ago

    why say their name when you could instead say “guy” or “man”, or, occasionally, “buddy”?

    • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
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      4 days ago

      Haha there’s a guy I hang out with at the library and I think he’s great.

      Wanted to invite him to a party and realized I had no way to get in touch. No name or anything.

      For like a month, I’ve been trying to visit the library at the same exact time to see if we bump into each other.

      Library stranger, I hope we meet again.

    • pemptago@lemmy.ml
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      4 days ago

      If someone I just met uses my name regularly I feel like they’re trying to sell me something.

      • psud@aussie.zone
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        3 days ago

        If someone I talk to keeps using my name, I think they’re following advice on how to remember names, and that they’re bad at names

        ‘The memory palace’ is the superior memorization method

  • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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    4 days ago

    I have ADHD (+ other stuff) and so names has always been a massive issue for me. A few years ago I just stopped trying because I don’t talk to most people anyways. out of the ~25 people in this class with me right now (fun fact! I am breaking a law by being on my phone rn :3) I know the name of,
    1: teacher
    2: girl with pink hair
    3: trans friend
    4: person who sits next to me and cannot understand what a function is to save his life
    5: someone who I sat next to in 3rd grade

    The others, no earthly idea. I have COWORKERS in this class who I don’t know their name 😓

    • sag@lemm.ee
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      4 days ago

      I have ADHD (+ other stuff) and so names has always been a massive issue for me. A few years ago I just stopped trying because I don’t talk to most people anyways.

      Me_irl

    • devfuuu@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      I spent more than 4 years working in a place were I just knew the names of the 10 people immediately around me. People kept talking about person X or Y from another floor or room and I had absolutely no fucking idea who they were talking about.

      • MutilationWave@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        So I travel all over for work at different places. I’ll start telling a story about something that happened three weeks ago to a coworker. “Oh yeah, where were you at?” Me- blank stare half the time.

        Sometimes it comes to me after a few seconds, sometimes I can’t even remember which state I was in.

        I used to be awful with names but I got better at that. Still below average, but better. I do have ADHD for what that’s worth.

    • proton_lynx@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      2 things that make it a little bit easier to remember other people’s names is repeating the name of the person after he/she just said it and trying to associate with another person you know that has the same name. It’s not perfect but it’s better than forgetting every single time.

      • southsamurai@sh.itjust.works
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        4 days ago

        You do know that telling someone with ADHD to just pay attention is like telling someone on a cane to jog, right?

        Dick move in other words

      • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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        4 days ago

        winter break starts tomorrow, I finished pretty much all my work last week. My school makes winter break start next week because of the way the semesters line up.
        I was forced to spend 3 hours in the gym today watching a students vs teachers basketball game. The most work I’ve done in the last 3 days is roll a die and draw a snowman depending on those numbers then doing math to figure out the chances of the ordering of them in AP Comp-Sci Principles lol

        I appreciate the message though. I try to understand all the information I can, even if I’m horrible at Spanish 2 and English 😭
        on the bright side, this is the last time I get to say “see ya next year” (I’m a senior in HS)

        • MutilationWave@lemmy.world
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          4 days ago

          Enjoy winter break. If you aren’t going to college (and I wouldn’t recommend it for most people), this will be the last time you have that much free time unless you live long enough, and make enough money, to retire. Well unless you have a wealthy and generous family. Congratulations if that’s the case, you won the birth lottery!

          Sorry to be such a downer. I forget there are high school kids on Lemmy. For what it’s worth I’m sorry about climate change, but that’s largely the fault of my elders and the corporations that control the government.

          Register to vote!

  • DJDarren@thelemmy.club
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    4 days ago

    “I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes…” - Ron Swanson