literally put shit on egg – enshitification
Eggshitification
Tell me you’ve never had to get eggs out of a nest, without telling me. Shit everywhere. They’re birds. So much shit.
- NFTs of specific eggs
- egg crypto currency
- mandatory AI driven (needs an account) app to use the egg
- lower the production to control the price
- lobby the gov to mandate that everyone needs to consume an egg a day & be able to prove it (or jail time)
- use personal data to determine the optimal price per eg for each customer
- egg loot boxesEgg lootboxes already exist, they’re called kinder surprise
Poor old USA never got Kinder surprise, the FDA stopped them from ever being sold there since a plastic shell in chocolate are “non-nutritive items implanted in food” that makes them “not suitable for sale”
I wonder why they don’t ban the king cakes in Louisiana. They all have a plastic baby in them and those things really can fuck up your teeth. They are also horrible but that’s a side issue.
Oh wow I just looked those up. Other than the plastic baby that looks tasty, although I may be biased since I may love baked goods too much
King cake is legitimately the worst cake I’ve ever eaten. They’re dry and flavorless and covered with multicolored sugar that always has an odd taste to it. Maybe a fresh one is OK but generally they’re made in the months leading up to Mardi Gras and they always sit around for a while. And then you lose a fucking tooth – and for bonus points, if you get the baby you have to buy the fucking cake next year.
Ah, then never mind. I’ll stick to just a slice of Cinnamon Apple cake
FDA is run by big microplastic, not smol macroplastic.
I think what you’re saying might be 100% correct. Just add a tablespoon of big oil and a cup of big pharma.
Plenty of calories in plastic
I’m vegan so I don’t eat plastic
Micro transaction: Get the yolk for free but the white costs .99
Want your eggs unfertilized? That’ll be $0.99 each
Won’t fertilised be more expensive since that would mean one could potentially make second generation produce?
Not really. I was thinking do you want your eggs to be guaranteed not to have blood spots or accidentally give you baluut? Pay extra.
Also, some weird people get very strange about eating fertilized eggs, like they’re full of rooster jizz. Which is stupid. It’s a chicken, eat it now or eat it later, you’re still eating a chicken.
like their full of rooster jizz
Hehe, all animals embryos are made of animal jizz.
Still better than stuff made out of the intestines which might have some remnant faecal matter if not cleaned properly.
I thought it would be something about eating a future-chicken vs eating an egg that would otherwise just rot away or be eaten by the chicken that laid it.
Right? People are just so weird sometimes
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Took me a minute to decipher through the minimal pixels but once I got it, made me giggle
Eggland’s Best already stamps their logo on the eggs they sell. I consider that advertising on the eggs.
Their eggs are so bad I’m surprised they don’t stamp other companies’ logos on them.
fun fact: chickens usually give 1 egg a month, but due to severe selective breeding, they give 1-2 a DAY. Ugh.
This comic shouldn’t be about the chickens, it’s the farmers who are doing the exploitation.
Nah, they bred them to lay more eggs. They are more than desirable. They WANTED this. More eggs = more money. Who cares about nutrition. LINE MUST GO UP
I find it kinda hard to understand how they are able to process nutrients into an egg so fast. and am inclined to believe that the nutrient composition would be very different, with the quick-layers being much less desirable.
Enchickification
Chicken Run 2.0
I’m just gonna mute those egg ads, the sizzle for crispy fried eggs no more for me
Sell the yolks separately.
Enchickenshitification
Technically chickens lay eggs and shit using the same external opening (cloacal opening), so it’s just a matter of controling shit-to-egg ratio. It was designed to carry out enshittification once they seize the global market. /s
Technically not free. They get free food, housing, and medical care. For some thats probably better than what they got now.
You mean suffer horribly in tiny cages and forced to pump out eggs at an unnatural rate and then slaughtered when they are deemed “spent”.
And cage-free is a minority of the world egg production. And even cage-free has issues with quality of life.
Not to mention the billions of male chicks that are ground alive the day they hatch because they are useless.
Pasture raised all day babyyyyy
Tbh even pasture raised isn’t perfect but it’s the only way I let myself engage with the egg industry
garden raised, or regenerative but these are more expensive eggs.
They get free food, housing, and medical care
To the same level that people imprisoned in Auschwitz did, yeah
and they are slaughtered when they’re no longer useful.
oh, you already said auschwitz.
Fewer eggs laid per week, but charge the same for them.
Eggs watch you and record all of your conversations
